Blue Bus

It was just like any other day after work. Except, today. One tiny detail about his journey home was different.

He rode the train as usual. He walked the usual path. He sang while he made little rhythmic steps to the songs in his head.

He doesn't know what inspired his next move. Maybe it was the police car that passed him by with the youths in it. Something about breaking the law.. Bending the rules or going against the authority. He wanted to have a taste of it.

As I did my double-takes while I crossed the forbidden path, an act known as jaywalking, I saw an oncoming huge, blue bus. It was slow but I know it was gaining momentum towards me.

I had this sudden image in my mind and my head was telling me this:

"Xing You, just picture yourself still standing on the road. And when the blue bus is about to hit you, you move away just in time. Are you a teeny bit curious to know how that feels?"

For a moment, I nearly stopped walking and wanted to just stand there. But my legs carried me forward. When I reached the other side of the road safely. I thought "Okay, dude. You just nearly had a near-death experience."

The rest of the journey was a quiet reflection, punctuated by Jason Mraz's songs in my ears. I'm not desperate for attention, I'm not suicidal. But there's just something about me that seems a little bit... off.

That's as far I'm going for tonight. I haven't quite collected all my thoughts because some parts of my brain are shut down due to fatigue.

Post-Poly Syndrome

Do I miss school?

Yes and no.

I miss paying for cheap food.

I miss hanging out with Ron. (TEP mini-adventures!)

I miss trying to rationalize people's strange behaviors.

I miss listening to Azhar's sarcastic jokes.

I miss working with like-minded people. Conflicts are fun. It breeds flexibility and expands thresholds for tolerance.

I miss XJ's lame jokes.

I miss Splash n Decker's sandwiches and mushroom soup.

I miss Ayin, Fin & Zaidah.

I miss having breakfasts in the morning with my clique.

I miss doing productions with Jon and Alistair. And my Newsbox crew too.

I miss my TEP locker. I pasted a cut-out picture of a supermodel clad in lingerie on it. It was awesome. Irked Jo. It was funny.

I miss tearing my lecture notes during exam periods. "... Eh fuck this. I'm gonna skip this part." -tears a bunch of paper into half- Then Jon told me how he threw his out of his house window. I guffawed for a good 5 seconds.

What I DON'T miss about school:

...

Actually, I have nothing against school. It was fun, exciting, frustrating, unbearable, painful, surprising, gleeful and so much more.

My only regret is that I didn't sign up for a CCA and commit to something bigger than myself. Always on about grades and afraid of screwing them up. I did well in my final GPA grade, but I had nothing else to offer in other aspects of my "well-rounded education" in NYP.

But I learnt a lot about people. And that's more than I can ask for. Trust me, there are a lot of what-you-call weirdos in my class.

Homosexuals, cynics, hypocrites, manipulators, divas. We are an unlikely bunch of people that CO-EXISTED as a class... And we SURVIVED! each other to pull through to the end of our polytechnic education.

I wrote this in my final TEP report:
"I've seen tears, smiles, frowns and other dramatic events I can't quite comprehend, but to be a part of this motley crew of misfits, including the lecturers themselves, it is an honour."

I know, I know.. It sounds really dramatic, but it's the truth, dammit!

Come next Monday, I'm going to be wearing a freakin' robe to go on stage to collect my diploma and my dad and elder sister are going.. Will be taking pictures and yada yada.

I just hope that the reader will pronounce my name right.

Complete Waste of Blogosphere

-Blinking cursor-

Okay, honestly, I haven't got a clue what I'm suppose to type about. Should I talk about my job? My job offer? The long SMS exchanges with a higher-evolved being?

Well, technically Vanessa has already gotten enlightenment. What she had told me, I understood some of it right away yet other things needed time to process. Were talking about friendship and love...

It's demoralizing and depressing to be alone. No, wait. It's demoralizing and depressing to be alone when you have other people you deeply care about.

I don't know. I never got the hang of detaching emotions from people. It's like a double-edged sword for me. I meant me being sentimental and having fucking empathy.

Blah, in no mood to continue.

See la! Rushing myself to blog.. And in the end, I get some half-assed effort of a post. It's a fucking horrible post. Grammar mistakes everywhere!

Apologies for having wasted your time, when you reach the end of it. You'll never get this 3 minutes of your life back.

Can't Walk Through Life Facing Backwards

Tune of the Week: Jason Mraz's Living In the Moment

Many meaningful sentences in this song. Just search the lyrics and relate to it. Might just change your perspective.

And I have a feeling I gotta blog something about my life real soon.

-shaking fists- "About time!!" - angry mob

Sheesh... Give the man some time.

Blind Leading the Blind

Tune of the Week: Keane's Disconnected

"I feel like I just don't know you anymore
I've been wrong and I've been there so many times
We walk in circles
The blind leading the blind
We've been disconnected somehow"



I particularly like this part of the lyrics. If you can look pass the horror movie mash-up music video and listen out for the lyrics, it's actually a pretty good break-up song. But whatever, I like Keane's songs... "Perfect Symmetry" album was shite though.