"The one you marry will never be the one you love the most." - Kevin Ang Wei Ming, 29, a single individual of no particular interest to anyone, except to those who knows him.
Yeah I suppose so. But I guess it's for the best.
Then again, I'm young. Relationship definitions change as I grow.
I predict that the next girl that'll matter will happen in the next 3-4 years' time.
But doesn't mean I won't forget about that friendship. Maybe I will. But I won't let that happen.
Sunday, August 26, 2012
Thursday, August 23, 2012
Bit SpareTime
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D0L__LYpHG8
This is how I feel my transcribing life is like right now. Instead of pots and pans and rubber gloves as distractions, there is absolutely no other mental disturbances in my head. Just words after words coming out of these women, and just mechanically typing all of it down into a word document.
Feels like running a darn mental marathon and I'm nearly there... I need a book, a novel. I need a physical activity (Cross out sex. Been acting out my work frustration through sex. It's not good, I think.) I need to do something creative. Playing the piano, compose a little sexy tune. Whatever you know.
This office is like a metaphor of me being cooped in a confined space with little things to spare for me to play. I don't think this is very healthy for my mind. I am a raven that needs to be let out, not caged. I won't miss transcribing when I'm done. I miss going out on shoots and sweating gallons of impure liquid. I miss writing. A lot. Now there's no fancy phrase going through my head.
There's nothing of value to influence my creativity capacity. Well, I can argue that listening to these girls talk actually gave me things to think about. Like the way they behave and shit. What is right and what is wrong. What are their motivations and how far they're willing to go just to win some beauty contest. And the list goes on. Manipulative minxes... Pfft.
Anyway, thinking of going overseas to study. A plan is slowly forming. The plan for my future, once I'm done with NS. Singapore's not a good place to do film, I feel. I need to meet more different people from overseas. Here, people are working themselves to death and it's a harsh industry here. I mean that's what I kind of infer. No one's really working for the artform. They just want to meet the profit margin and get by life. Not risky enough, not enough budget, not much room for improvement in the creativity department.
But I've seen some creative stuff. Nice things that shoved one side to make space for mainstream things. Like music videos. Singapore independent bands' music videos are interesting to watch. I really do hope the local music industry does thrive well.
This is how I feel my transcribing life is like right now. Instead of pots and pans and rubber gloves as distractions, there is absolutely no other mental disturbances in my head. Just words after words coming out of these women, and just mechanically typing all of it down into a word document.
Feels like running a darn mental marathon and I'm nearly there... I need a book, a novel. I need a physical activity (Cross out sex. Been acting out my work frustration through sex. It's not good, I think.) I need to do something creative. Playing the piano, compose a little sexy tune. Whatever you know.
This office is like a metaphor of me being cooped in a confined space with little things to spare for me to play. I don't think this is very healthy for my mind. I am a raven that needs to be let out, not caged. I won't miss transcribing when I'm done. I miss going out on shoots and sweating gallons of impure liquid. I miss writing. A lot. Now there's no fancy phrase going through my head.
There's nothing of value to influence my creativity capacity. Well, I can argue that listening to these girls talk actually gave me things to think about. Like the way they behave and shit. What is right and what is wrong. What are their motivations and how far they're willing to go just to win some beauty contest. And the list goes on. Manipulative minxes... Pfft.
Anyway, thinking of going overseas to study. A plan is slowly forming. The plan for my future, once I'm done with NS. Singapore's not a good place to do film, I feel. I need to meet more different people from overseas. Here, people are working themselves to death and it's a harsh industry here. I mean that's what I kind of infer. No one's really working for the artform. They just want to meet the profit margin and get by life. Not risky enough, not enough budget, not much room for improvement in the creativity department.
But I've seen some creative stuff. Nice things that shoved one side to make space for mainstream things. Like music videos. Singapore independent bands' music videos are interesting to watch. I really do hope the local music industry does thrive well.
Sunday, August 12, 2012
Wifey, Mother & All That Stuff That Comes Along...
Was out with N the other day. Saw a guy wearing matching shirt and shorts of a particular light blue colour. I had no problem with the shirt, just that his shorts was a bit distracting. A little too short for my taste and looked pretty... *shudders* Yah, so...
Didn't hesitate a second to tell N what I saw. I honestly thought she would laugh and agree with me. Instead, I was given a lecture about criticizing people. Then I shot her that look. Because she does it sometimes to people, including me. N just laughed and said "Yah, it took me a second to realize... But it's different. I do it because it's helping them to change. You do it with the intention to criticize."
Yup, that's right. She's right...
I need N in my life. Can't lose this siaocharbor laopo. But...
On another note, my maid told me today it's been 3 weeks since my quarrel with my mom and we still haven't spoken to each other. I don't think it has been that long. Or has work diminished my sense of time, because, as far as I remember, I thought it was a week ago.
She called me fat, and I said I'd kill her in her sleep, as a joke, but the vehement feeling still lingers. Okay get this, I don't care if friends or colleagues call me fat, but coming from my own mother, that's just not okay. Plus, she always annoys me with her negativity.
Yah, I get it, you're 60, you have diabetes, high blood pressure and you're still working. But that's not the example you should set for your children and also, you're affecting all of us. And I've tried to persuade her to be more positive. I told her things like "Hey Ma, today's vegetables the maid cooked are nice, have some," And she would say a straight no and continue eating her pizza. Or whatever she brought home. She ignores the healthy food and goes straight for the junk food. No fish, no meat, no veggie, only salted veggie/egg with porridge. She doesn't even drink the soup, that is occasionally nice.
I want to love her but I just wish she was a little more nicer with her words and be a more of a role model to her children. Sometimes children see the worst in their parents and they make promises to themselves to never be like them in the future. But now I'm behaving like her, stubborn, childish and petty.
This is just absurd la. I need to talk to Vanessa soon.
Funny thing is I never met Vanessa for a long time, but she gives excellent perspectives and advices.
I need to stop typing. I was typing a few things that I don't like, then I backtracked.
Issues everywhere. How I can deal with them? I don't know if I can do this...
Didn't hesitate a second to tell N what I saw. I honestly thought she would laugh and agree with me. Instead, I was given a lecture about criticizing people. Then I shot her that look. Because she does it sometimes to people, including me. N just laughed and said "Yah, it took me a second to realize... But it's different. I do it because it's helping them to change. You do it with the intention to criticize."
Yup, that's right. She's right...
I need N in my life. Can't lose this siaocharbor laopo. But...
On another note, my maid told me today it's been 3 weeks since my quarrel with my mom and we still haven't spoken to each other. I don't think it has been that long. Or has work diminished my sense of time, because, as far as I remember, I thought it was a week ago.
She called me fat, and I said I'd kill her in her sleep, as a joke, but the vehement feeling still lingers. Okay get this, I don't care if friends or colleagues call me fat, but coming from my own mother, that's just not okay. Plus, she always annoys me with her negativity.
Yah, I get it, you're 60, you have diabetes, high blood pressure and you're still working. But that's not the example you should set for your children and also, you're affecting all of us. And I've tried to persuade her to be more positive. I told her things like "Hey Ma, today's vegetables the maid cooked are nice, have some," And she would say a straight no and continue eating her pizza. Or whatever she brought home. She ignores the healthy food and goes straight for the junk food. No fish, no meat, no veggie, only salted veggie/egg with porridge. She doesn't even drink the soup, that is occasionally nice.
I want to love her but I just wish she was a little more nicer with her words and be a more of a role model to her children. Sometimes children see the worst in their parents and they make promises to themselves to never be like them in the future. But now I'm behaving like her, stubborn, childish and petty.
This is just absurd la. I need to talk to Vanessa soon.
Funny thing is I never met Vanessa for a long time, but she gives excellent perspectives and advices.
I need to stop typing. I was typing a few things that I don't like, then I backtracked.
Issues everywhere. How I can deal with them? I don't know if I can do this...
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