My head is a ticking time-bomb ready to explode and destroy my life. So much thinking and thinking sometimes just complicates my relationships with people for nothing. Talked to many friends about it and they all said that I am the only one doing this to myself. Realized how true that was. Now, I'm trying suppress all those imaginative thoughts...
Besides, I was mad for a while for the stupid path I got myself into. I want to direct a feature movie before I hit 20... And I'm going to be 19 soon. What the heck?! There was a lot more but I don't want to talk about it anymore. Screw this mess of a life. I'm going to be a paperboy when I grow up.
And I think I can live without friends. I can live among the living and ignore them. Sometimes I can blend in very well, I guess. I am a random person. The best description I have of myself is that, I'm a living encyclopedia of profound nonsense and random info. I am a mixed of personalities. And that is me. Because I am influenced by my surroundings, a sponge if you will. People just don't get my randomness and gets turned off by that, I don't blame them.
I can keep very quiet when I'm awkward, but I choose not to. I can be as animated as I can be whenever I'm happy. When I'm sad, I lay on my bed trying to slip into a coma or something. When I'm nervous, I get uptight. When I'm angry, I seethe. I switch between seriousness and humour with ease sometimes.
Sound like a normal human being eh? Yeah, in a way yes. I don't hide my feelings. In fact, I don't hide my feelings very well. But I'm very good at amplifying them. So I'm theatrical and dramatic and stuff like in the movies. But that's who I am. And I hate for my mumbling problem. Having a really low voice don't help at all... Must be the damned lips!...
Bye and whatever.
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